Just trying to keep out of it...

It's been hard this week. My daughter started back at public school in her home town for the first time in 6 years. She spent 4 years commuting into Edmonton, and two years away at boarding schools.

She has never been in a school with more than 300 students in it, and her new school has over 1500. There are more kids in her grade than there were in her entire K-12 school last year! Its been hard not to be in her face with advice and 'support' (or what she would call "butting in").

Its been VERY hard if I'm going to be honest, because she started with the premise that she was going to hate it, and that no one was going to like her. I doubt there is anything more heartbreaking to hear than that when you know your daughter is the most wonderful, amazing, totally like-able person! But there we were.

She asked that I come to school with her for the first day. So I did. The first time in her life I have been to the first day of school. She wouldn't even let me go when she started Kindergarten! So clearly she was freaked out a bit, just to be asking. So I went.

And I took her out for a nice dinner afterwards. And I did *shhh don't tell anyone* let her sip from my vodka lemonade while I sipped from her plain one. And I bought chocolate cake for desert.

And then when she said she was never going back, I got up with her for day two and went to school with her again. I even stood around the classroom door before class looking like an idiot (or maybe a stalker, lol) until she finally told me that I could leave.

I probably talked too much talk "give it a chance" and "don't pre-judge it" etc, etc. But in the end SHE will - or will not - make friends. SHE will - or will not - figure out that this school is not living hell. SHE will - or will not - start on the right foot.

And really? There is NOTHING I can do. She is totally responsible for what she makes of this school year. The best I can do is to keep out of it, and not add any pressure to what she is going through. Distract her when I can, comfort her when she will let me, and trust that everything that she has learned over the years will see her through this year too.